What I Learned: From Doing Standup Comedy

Last week I did something I've been wanting to do and dreading for a long, long time - Stand Up Comedy.
I went to an Open Mic night at a bar in town, and had the amazing support of a bunch of friends of mine showing up to cheer me on.
I honestly don't think I've ever been that scared about a performance in my entire life. I am SO glad I did it and knocked down the massive mental block I've built around it. It was scary and exciting all at the same time. 
I hope I do it again at some point, but for now here's what I learned:

• The only thing to fear is fear itself
• BE FLEXIBLE
• "You are braver than you believe, Stronger than you seem, and Smarter than you think." ~ Winnie the Pooh
• Take deep breaths
• You're your own harshest critic
• Comment and move on
• ALWAYS be writing things down - never let an idea slip away
• Get off the sidelines and into the game
• Don't make fun of anyone who's doing something you're too scared to do
• Comedy, like almost everything else in life, is totally subjective
• Steer into the Skid
• Believe in Yourself and Commit to your Material, no matter what medium!
• "Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious"
• NEVER tone down your intelligence to please a crowd - especially you, ladies
• It's ridiculous to expect to be amazing at something the first time you do it
• Try to dress in a way that makes you confident and happy all the time
• Not everything has to be a home run - just get on base
• It's necessary to have a sense of humor about yourself
• You can be clean and smart and still be funny
• Set expectations lower and you'll be less disappointed 
• You know you have really good friends when they wait 2 hours in the cold through a bunch of horrible comedy to see you perform for 5 minutes
• "With comedy, you have no place to go but more comedy, so you're never off the hook."
• Be yourself and say what you think
• The most successful moments in dealing with people are the relatable ones
• Ignore the hecklers of the world
• Don't ever apologize for your thoughts and ideas
• Trick people so the only person who know's you're afraid is you
• Seize that fucking day
• Don't judge your audience
• Don't judge yourself
• No matter how complimentary people are, NEVER accept shots of Scotch.